I was lucky enough to be able to breastfeed both of my tots, and whilst it is one of the best things I have experienced as a Mum so far, it certainly wasn’t quite the natural and pain free process that I had expected to begin with. The stories and support of other Mums kept me going, and so I feel privileged to be able to share my story.
Of course me being me though, it had to rhyme…
Why would someone knit a boob anyway?
You’ve read the books, and Googled it, Your midwife’s told and shown.
Your boobs are set to go!
(And need a postcode of their own).
You’ve had a “tricky” labour but the time at last has come,
Get those boobs out lovely,
It is time.
You are a Mum!
But all those fluffy baby books don’t show it quite like this?
All “Glowing Mum” with make up on?
It kind of takes the… erm…
In truth you’re on a labour ward, and still somewhat in shock.
You’re off your face on Pethidine and bleeding quite a lot.
You’ll have a dazed attempt, but then despite your best endeavour.
It’s generally your midwife that shoves “Tot” and “Tit” together.
And though it’s oh so natural and such a moving thing…
You wonder if it’s normal when your nipples start to sting?
The midwife says it shouldn’t hurt.
The latching must be wrong?
You follow their instructions and you bravely soldier on….
Your baby seems to like it with a constant need to snack?
Your poor old nips are shredded as they slowly start to crack!
And then your milk comes flooding in.
Your boobs just might explode!!
You bear each feed through gritted teeth.
Your bra’s on overload.
A flood of health professionals come knocking at your door.
Midwives with their “knitted boob”, Health visitors and more.
And desperate for some new advice, Despite once being shy,
You’ll gladly whip those bad boys out for any passer by.
You’re hassled by the “Breast Police”
All chanting “Breast is best!”
You’re swamped with guilt and hormones and so desperate just to rest.
You hold your breath and panic as your baby hits the scales,
Will a lack of weight gain be considered “Mummy fails”?
You feel less like a woman now and more a veggie patch,
With cabbage in your bra and springing leaks – you’re quite a catch! ;0)
You try to do “Expressing” but with all the best intentions,
You find electric breast pumps quite the cruelest of inventions.
You shy away from leaving home and lengthy shopping trips.
It feels bizzare in coffee shops,
Just whipping out your nips?
You try to do “covert” and shove your offspring up your top,
While baby tries to play and faff and poke and have a strop.
In just a week or two…
You find the pain has gone!
You’ve both now got the hang of it!
You’re thrilled to carry on!
You find it rather easy when she wakes at 3am,
Just pop her on a boob, and then she’s back to sleep again.
Your milk is always perfect, nice and warm and close at hand.
There’s always just the right amount,
And ready on demand.
So now with every feed you get the chance to stroke and snuggle,
Little eyes peer up at you in such a precious cuddle.
And sometimes from within that warm, contented, safe embrace,
A tiny hand will reach for you and softly touch your face.
And this for me was everything.
I cherished every feed.
I loved it that together we could meet her every need.
Which doesn’t for one minute mean I’m saying “Breast is best!”
Each Mummy knows what’s best for her so bugger all the rest!
Although…. Breastfeeding burns 500 k-cals (give or take).
Which really can’t be sniffed at when converted into CAKE!!
So thank you to the midwives and those experts in the know.
For all your help and guidance.
(And thank God for Lansinoh!!)
But as for all those baby books,
I do not hold a grudge,
Just please add for the record:
Is it easy?
Is it fudge!!
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